(To: Chaos) (From: Rain)

Ahhh!
Dont be sad!!!
When I said I didn't like mexicans, you were not supposed to take it personally...
I dont like the mexican guys that yell at me...
Or glare...
I hate it when I'm walking by myself, and they start walking towards me with their friends, yelling at me, and being like, "Hey you girlie! Come here!"
And they start yelling at me, when I start hurrying away..and AHHHHHHHH

I'm already scared of guys...
I guess its not that I dont like mexicans, I know alot of nice ones, now that I think about it...
I'm just scared of them...

Please dont take it personally...if you are mexican....
please?
Dont be mad at me...

Angel is already mad at me, and I think its because I am not that big of a fan of Michael Jackson...but now hes not talking to me....
:(

Please dont be mad at me to...I wont be able to bear it...

<3 <3 <3

Bad bad bad...I'm trying not to hypervenilate...

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Starting tomorrow and ending when school starts, I begin to babysit my cousin...every day...
Her mum told me to take her to the pool every day, so that my cousin can see her friends...
But this is the cousin that lives in the apartment complex...the same one as the creepy guy at the pool...

That means, being that he told me, that he usually goes to the pool, at least three times a week, that I will see him again...soon...
Pepper spray?
As Chaos suggested...

Well, the only problem is...I wouldn't have the nerve to use it...
My problem is, is that I'm to nice...
I can't be mean...I can pretend when I'm with people I know really well, but they know I'm joking...
I dont have the guts to tell this guy to go away...
I've tried this with another guy, I tried to tell him to go away, but I freaked out, and didnt do it...
Instead I smiled and said Hi, and started talking to him...

(scream)
Thanks for commenting you guys! Your all the greatest...

<3 <3 <3 xoxo

Oh gosh...I ran into another creeper today..well I admit, I saw the trap but walked in anyway...
I should know better by now...(my parents were not there, and my aunt was in her apartment..not good)

I went to the pool today, not a big public one, but a small apartment complex one, where my aunt lives...
I was sitting in the hot tub talking to this little girl and boy...
when their friend walks up, and I know this is creepy, but he was like in his twenties...
He was playing with them earlier on...

Anyway, he asked them, if they wanted to play marco polo...and they said yes..
Then turning to me, asked if I wanted to play...
Going against my better judgement, I agreed, and went to the bigger pool with them...
The whole pool was deserted, except for him, the little girl, the little boy, and I...

We started playing, and the guy was it, he tagged to the little boy, and so we kept playing...
The little boy was about nine years old, and the little girl around eight...
The boy was slow, and couldn't catch anyone...even though he kept peeking form time to time...
The guy grabbed my shoulders, and holding me in front of him, called the boy...
I struggled but this guy was hecka strong, and wouldn't let me go..
So they little boy tagged me...

We played for about ten more minutes, and then we stopped...
The little girl asked if I was ticklish, and I immediately answered no, even though I am the most ticklish person in the world...
The little girl tried to tickle me, which is already awkward..but to make things even more so...
When she found out that I was, and I began to swim away...the guy grabs me by my leg, and pulled me over to him...
Then holds me around the waist, and tells the kids to tickle me...
I kept trying to tell them to quit, but I was laughing to hard...
Ugh...

I went their at around seven and stayed till ten...
And all through that time...
The guy kept grabbing me, and would either have me by the arms in front of him, so that the little kids couldn't splash him, or he'd have me by the waist, and let the kids tickle me...
At one point I got out of the pool, and was walking along the edge, when the little boy got out of the water, and started running towars me, so I started running around the oppisite side...
The guy got out of the water to, and came after me...
The little boy started like trying to hit me, and I was like, oh gosh!
So I was holding him off, when the guy came up and moved the kid, then wrapping his arm around my waist, started running towards the pool...
Then when he was almost at the edge, he whispered for me to just jump....
So I did, and he stood there, making it look like he had thrown me in...

Crazy night...
I have got to get batter at telling people to stop, or whatever...
I'm TO nice, and it gets annoying after awhile, but one day, when I'm over being scared of people, I might just be able to tell them, what I want...

I know this is long, and you guys are really wonderful to have put up with this post for this long, but one last thing...
When I got home from the pool, my friend calls me, shes the one with the mean older brother, thte guy that hates me..
She was crying and went on to tell me that her brother got pissed at her, so he had messed with her computer, and she was fed up with it, because he does this stuff all the time!
He went on her ipod and deleted 95% of her songs, and the list of stuff he does goes on and on..
So she told me that tonight she had had enough, so she went into his room, when he wasnt there, and she deleted all his contacts off his cell phone, and had taken his memory card chip out from the back of his phone, and had it in her pocket...

When he found out, he had grabbed her and shaken her, and kept hitting her, yelling at her to give it back...that went on for about ten minutes, and she didnt give in...
She told him that she wouldnt give it to him, until he was nice...

While we were talking, she stopped, and said someone was at her door...
So she went over there, and it was him...
He smashed through the lock on the door, and started shaking and hitting her, again..and this time, she finally gave it to him...

I felt sooo bad, cause there is nothing I can do, and her mother doesnt let her have friends over alot, and its just all bad... :(

Sad and alone...comfort me?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1vHM-BNDUD4

Lonely...I am miss lonely..I have nobody, for my own...

You said you loved me, and everytime you did, I believed you...
But then you stopped, and I've stopped believeing that you do...
I keep apoligizing, but it doesnt matter...
Your slowly shutting the door, inch by inch,
shutting me out...
Your changing, and its fine, everyone does...
But you no longer care for me...
Its harder for me to move on though,
you've become my life...

This isnt written about me...but for someone else...

Singling people out is fun... :)

Well, not much has happened since the cousins came...
I had to remember what I did with my life, before they were here...
Its sad, but that how bad my memory is, but I'm back on track...I dont really do anything..
Do chores during the day, do computer all night..and talk to people on the phone..haha

I went out to ice cream with my dad today, that was fun...
We talked about how I needed plans for my future and what I'm doing about collage...
I figure that I've got two more years, nothing to worry about...right?
Well not according to him...ah well...

Stephen and Angel, I hope your enjoying your country life...and that you hurry up and get back, so that we see you on blogger more often...
Stephen come over to the United States, and I'll cut your hair for you...I'm quite good actually...
Angel, I know your not really exactly enjoying yourself...but I'm sure Stephen appriciates all your efforts...dont you Stephen... (cough...nudge)

Dakota, Chaos, and Stephen...I just want to say that I think it was amazing of you guys to all suffer through reading my whole report of the cousins...that report was hecka long, and you all read it... so you all win prizes!
The prize is...ummm...a...HUG!!!!
haha

(hug) (hug) (hug)
<3

I'm Home!!!!

Sorry that this is going to be so long, and that it probably gets really annoying , because I dont like to say peoples names...so bear with me...
Stephen said he wanted to know everything...even the color of the sky...so here goes...

On Wednesday the three girl cousins, with there mum and dad, and my grandparents, came at six thirty p.m....
The grownups went to stay at a hotel, and the girl cousins got to stay here, in my room... :)
There dad is SO strict...yes, stricter then my mother...and he was like, "NO talking past nine, and I want you all asleep by nine to!" He said this at eight fifty, pm...I was like...lovely...
Oh well....
My mother gave me a HUGE lecture before they came, about NO talking back, and I had to do anything they wanted me to, and that I wasn't allowed to run off, etc...ugh
Oh, and on Wednesday the sky was blue...haha


On Thursday I woke up, and we cleaned all day long...that night I had to go to a dress rehearsal, for ballet...
My group were guest dancers, at some small schools recital...
Not much happened...
My three girl cousins and I were sitting in the car singing, on the way to the store...somehow we started singing, 'Rain,Rain go away, come again another day', that was not nice...but we all laughed...
But the sky was a very gorgeous blue with puffy clouds...


Friday...big surprise we all cleaned the house again...its what my mothers side of the family LOVES to do...ugh
Later I went to the ballet recital thingy, and went home...more cousins and aunts and uncles were there if you can believe it...
Everyone went to their hotels at about eleven thirty, and some of them stayed here at my house...including my favorite cousin... :)
He and I sat in the kitchen talking to one in the morning...it was soo much fun...
It was a good night except for the fact that I had been kicked out of my room and out onto the couch...haha


Saturday was the day that things happened...
We cleaned all morning, and I didn't because I had to get ready for our last performance...and leave at eleven thirty...
So I went to go get ready at ten or so, and then we left...
I got in HUGE trouble...cause my aunt went to my mother, and started ratting on me about how I hadnt helped, and how I was a terrible worker and so on...
but its all good now...kinda...haha
My neighbor drove me to this performance, and my favorite cousin went with me... :)
He sat and watched the whole ballet thingy..just for me...and for the sake of getting out of doing chores at home...hahaha
Then we all went to Starbucks...and got home around four...

At four we were having a huge party, with all the family and friends...so we had about forty people...
I was still in major trouble, so instead of getting to go out and talk, etc...I was stuck in the kitchen...Finally all the dishes were done, and their was nothing left to clean up, so I went out and we played basketball...
Boys against girls...
Ugh..the girls lost terrible...cause all three of my boy cousins are really good at basketball...one is 6'5, and that kind of helps, another can shoot the ball into the basket from any distance, and the third IS a basketball player, and really good, except just a little young...haha
But it was fun...

My self esteem was slowly sinking, cause I don't know why but one of my guy cousins absolutely hates me... he just insulted me the whole time....
Ugh...why do guys have a habit of hating me for no good reason...do they just look at me, and decide to hate me or something? Maybe its a guy thing...help?


Sunday Morning Iwas woken up at eight and went out to say goodbye because 3/4 of the cousins and aunts and uncles were leaving...and my grandparents...
All that was left was my favorite cousin, and his mom...(my favorite aunt) and
the mean cousin and his family...
My fav cousin, and his mum slept at our house, and the other family didn't come till around eleven..
When he finally woke up, he and I were sitting on the couch in the living room, when I found that I had a rubber band...not the kind for hair, but the plastic kind...that are usually found on vegetables...
I was showing him that if you snap it on a certain place on your wrist it doesn't hurt a bit...
I did it to him, and then he did it to me...
I have really delicate skin, so I got these big puffy welts on my wrist, haha
He had nothing...
He was like, "Gosh Rain, it looks like you got whipped!" hahhahahaha

And then they left...

The End...

Waiting for people to come, is one of the hardest things in the world...

Don't cry Stephen, I'll be back...
When it rains, I'm there with you, so be mindful of your actions...I'm watching you...lol

We called them at two thirty, and they said they would be here in four hours...so I've got time...
I've been cleaning all day, and am entirely sick of it...
When they get here I am going to slap them all, like Angel suggested...

I think I'll also slap that guy who hates me, and say its from Angel...but with his permission of course...may I Angel???
Pleeeeease?
I'd call you Sean, but you always have that little dash thing in the middle of the E and the A, and I cant find how to do that on my computer...but if you want I could resort back to just Sean...
Whatever you want...

What am I going to do without you all til Monday?
I will be slowly dying, the pain will fill me up and then I shall burst, and die...
And then of course it would be appropriate to cry THEN Stephen..haha
Mother coming...bye!